At the Altar of Aging: Sorrows of the Senile

It’s a poignant issue which needs to be addressed through deeds and not words. It’s about a grave issue encountered by the helpless at the twilight of their life; it’s about the plight of the elderly. (This article is written in response to the news reports of dumping the elderly by their relatives). Aged or senile as they are referred to, population of this section of citizens is on the rise and so also are the atrocities against them. How can one determine age or aging? Aging is simply not an inevitable biological process. It may be chronological, emotional, physiological or psychological. Age makes men wise. As a fruit becomes sweeter on ripening, so does a man. (“Fruits sweeten only when they ripen, Old age is one such fruit”., Ref: Ageless mind and spirit by Samar. S. Jodha). In spite of their physical frailties, they form a generation rich in life experiences and wisdom but unfortunately are neglected and least cared for. Vulnerable to the insensitiveness of none other than their own kith and kin, the senior citizens are left with no choice, but to tolerate them. Seldom does the younger generation realize the need of the elderly and require their presence in this self-absorbed world, lacking any empathy.

Poverty is the deadliest ‘disease’ in the society. Everything has value except human life. But at present, old age has assumed the status of a miserable phase and dreaded experience in one’s life, poverty adding fuel to the fire. Why? Because of the way society has ‘progressed’. In the world of globalization and consumerism, where the whole globe has denigrated to a market, where nations are built on economic power; every individual seems to be a customer in one or the other way. We are taught how to dress, how to speak, and how to conduct ourselves before our customer. The plastic smiles are not inherited but acquired to please our customer. Unfortunately; no one had trained or taught us how to behave with the elderly or for that matter the under-privileged. Does age deprive the elderly of their dignity and fortunes and ring in a world of miseries? For many death is better, death emancipates them from the weary world of wickedness, loneliness and isolation. In India it is just considered destiny and not a social evil. Many lives end on roads, footpaths, besides temples and other public places. There are in fact a lot of real life examples to quote here regarding the inhuman acts meted out by the senior citizens of this country which have become common, predominant and at the same time heart-wrenching (only for some one with a good heart). There are but a few lucky exceptions, those who end their life peacefully and with due respect.

We were always proud of the joint family system, the strength of relations and family bonding, but it seems everything has evaporated out, with the gush of time. We are busy, too busy for even fulfilling our needs, a day is not sufficient for most of us, then how can it be spent for someone or even bothering for someone if that someone is dependent on us either for the basic needs or emotional needs or if they are unproductive on the basis of monetary benefits? We don’t have enough time, time to stop and stare or care. Once they were everything for us, supporting us, struggling to meet our needs, we were dependent on them; part of their life, for some of them may be life itself. What has become so important for us, our life, our false pride or our struggles of life? We have come to live life through our parents. There should not be any excuses to discard them from our life for what ever reasons. One cannot shirk of responsibilities. Our elderly are not bundles of burden; we would not have existed if we were regarded as burden. It is the most heinous crime against humanity. It is very clear, very evident we are least concerned of our senior citizens, we have transformed to insensitive brutes that we are into another social evil and are not even aware of that.

The news, nay the reality that our elderly are left to suffer, deserted in the footpaths, in the roads, in beaches, in the temples or places of worship and in old age homes (the more sophisticated form of isolation), is thought-provoking. How many students of medicine do opt for geriatrics as a subject of study? No one who wants a lucrative career for sure would take such a decision. It has recently become highly fashionable and a contagious practice to desert our elderly or dump them into old age homes. Are the old age homes garages or prisons for the senior citizens? The situation is not different for those who had led a life of grace and have enough to support themselves. The senior citizens (even affluent) are haunted by the loneliness and the “empty nest syndrome”. The solace seems to be pets; at least animals are far better than humans. The affluent living alone in cities are vulnerable to attacks from antisocial elements and live in constant fear of being looted.

Maimed is their mind and wrecked their hearts, but still they have become hard enough to bear the trauma of ostracism by their own children. The government has taken small but laudable steps to culminate this “social” (or attitude?) disorder by providing incentives and health care to the senior citizens. It is plain ridiculous, the idea of compelling the younger generation or family of the elderly to feed or take care of the elderly. How many elderly will be content or happy to live with such a family who are just for grabbing the money government is providing? But that seems the only option left in a “democratic” country like ours. Something is better than nothing. Our conscience is dead. All are mortal. This is the eternal truth. In this short journey of life, change is the only thing which is constant. Why don’t we realize that we are also walking to the ultimate destination of death and will soon lose our youthfulness, vitality and energy and pass through the same stage, the dreaded old age? Why do not we feel the pain and suffering that they undergo? How pathetic and miserable it would be to live a lonely life when they need us the most. Unfortunate are those mothers, those fathers who have to meet such a fate as to be cut off from their family, to spend their rest of life begging in the streets, none to provide food, clothes or shelter. Cursed are those lives that cannot oblige or acknowledge the love and care provided by their fathers and grand fathers. Such criminals should be dealt toughly by law, if they have not learnt their lessons. Old age is a debilitating phase of life, a phase sans eyes, sans ears, sans taste, or sans senses. Usher in the ambitious, self-oriented younger generations, the purely mechanical machines, who have precociously become senile sans the mind, conscience, emotions, feelings and kind or an empathetic heart. Whither to without our elderly?

A mighty flame can result from a far away spark. Let us hope that millions of sparks can be ignited with powerful words. These words, let them be not borne out of hypocrisy, or for writing sake, but from the depths to find their true destination, let these at least alter the attitude of the concerned so that there will be hands to hold on for those hapless aged humans, there shall be hands to wipe out the tears rolling down those wrinkled cheeks, that there will be shoulders to support those frail bodies, an act of kindness or at least a word of concern which they long for!!!